the aftermath of the birthday

heh yeah i finally turned 27...a step closer to the big 3-0.

and yes i had a fab time with friends at cafe del mar and so on.

the ones who turned up: viv and krys; my sis gen, brabra, bryan ho, joe, dawn, evy, dan, grace and jenna.

it felt serene seeing the sun set in the beach setting of cafe del mar...with strangely slow trance tunes in the air and the zen like still air filling our noses...and giving us our every breath.

likewise i guess that's how i see life now.

"let it be" mantra.

how i'm feeling is depicted by tiesto's mtv below heh.



generally... i feel blessed.....just as i am as disappointed in life.

i have wonderful friends who care a lot about me...despite my very own imperfections and limitations. my bizarre mood swings. my indecisive nature. my odd ability to go back on my word. my bad temper. my pessimism. my resigned nature.

and yeah... i was supposed to turn my back on him.

supposed to.

yet i guess people say one will feel lonely right after the birthday celebration when all the anticipation of excitement dies down.

i msged him...and he responded.

i don't know what to do say.. but he's always there when i needed someone to cuddle and to hug and to talk to.

it's really hard to move on la.

especially from the very person who understands me and knows how to make me happy so instinctively and vice versa.

i'm not upset. i'm not deluded and certainly not unhappy.

i'm just at a stage where i feel the two Ws.

whatever and will see how things go. (ok four more extra words haha)