happy versus sad thoughts

how does one express emotions? is it through words, facial expression, touch, non-verbal or verbal communication?

just a walk along memory lane showcases a rather negative track record of mine. haha. rather "emo" language used to depict pain, sadness, being heartbroken, despair, anguish. perhaps i'm more used to writing about pain. pain seems to be the main theme of my life for the longest time - so much so that i became a best friend with that emotion. that i could write about it. talk about it. express it so eloquently.

yet i am at a loss when it comes to expressing happiness.

is it because i'm not used to experiencing it? or is it because i'm denying myself of enjoying those moments because i know it's going to be yet another fleeting moment of the eye of the storm?

in the end do happy or sad thoughts win the day?

depends on the individual i suppose.

sorry not making any sense... feels as if my brain is degenerating.